Max's Language

Max isn't talking yet but she's getting there. She says the normal things like, momma, dad-o, papaw, Nana, pup, wow, bebe (baby), Tss Stt (Toy Story) etc. She has a different way to communicate too.

It's possible I'm the only one who can translate this, because I see/hear it all the time. It's heavy on the vowels and quite hilarious.

A few examples:

When Max and Ruby pops up on Nickelodeon she gets really excited and says, "Maaaaaaaaaaa!" This is simply translated to "Omigosh it's Max and Ruby! I'm so FRIGGIN excited!"

When I say, "Anybody wanna eat?" She runs to the kitchen and screams "Eeeeeeeeeee!" Easy translation is "Omigosh I'm so hungry! This is so FRIGGIN exciting."

If Jax takes something away from her (which is all the time) she belts out a big, "BAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!" This one's a little more difficult but with the help of Google Translate and the emotions on her face accompanied by the waving of her arms its easy to tell she's saying, "OMIGOSH SISTER STOP TAKING MY STUFF THIS IS NOT FRIGGIN EXCITING!"

It's easy to see where all of this is going so I will just leave you with one more...life sometimes is just a little exciting and when it gives Max something to enjoy she let's out a simple "Aaaaaaaaahhhhh!" With the help of this visual aide at the end of this blog I can translate it to, "Omigosh I love getting to color while we wait for food! This is so FRIGGIN exciting!"

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I love my little weirdos.

Jax likes to name things. Once she names it, it will never change. An example is the pacooter room. She can say "computer." But refuses to use that word. I must admit that pacooter is more fun to say...but still, this may need to be fixed soon.
Another thing she has given name to is the restaurant. Any and all restaurants have the same title, "Hungry House." Months back she asked if we were going to the the "hungry house." Husband and I looked to one another, shrugged our shoulders, and said "yeah." And that was it.

Now, she can recognize logos. She will tell you if we are going to Wendy's, McDonald's, Chic-fil-a, or wherever else. But all together its just a hungry house. When we pull up to Chili's she will relent a little by saying, "Oooo...a BIG hungry house."

To me, its hilarious, adorable, I love it/never want to change it....but yesterday when we were leaving the pediatrician's office, Jaxon asked if we were going to the hungry house.

Well, I'm wrestling with Max/ushering a 3 year old who's fascinated with the world/trying not to trip over my feet and appease her by saying "Yes, we will go to the hungry house."

"Oooh yeah!" She says, "We're going to the hungry house." She does her "hungry house shimmy" and that's when an office full of pediatricians and nurses look at me like WHAT THE FRACK ARE YOU TEACHING YOUR CHILD?!

I laughed. I explained. They laughed. And we all went about our day.

But its nagging at me, for one reason only. I don't know why it is that my mom's side of the family does this but when we eat Macaroni and Cheese, we DO NOT call it by its nickname, Mac n Cheese. We call it Cheese Noodles. Because that's what it is! Cheesy noodles!

I always get the weird looks from friends....or when I'm ordering it at a Hungry House, my husband will cringe, apologize to the waitress that I don't get out much, and ask for mac n cheese....(noted: his reaction is in a joking loving manner...in no way is he rude about it).

Anyway, this is yet another pointless, random blog about why my daughters are destined to grow up like their crazy mother...so please be nice to them when they ask to go to a Hungry House to order Cheese Noodles.

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There's an app for that.

So. I have a new application for my phone. Maybe, just maybe, I will be blogging more. Anyway, for now I'm just seeing if this works the way I want it to.

I guess I can make this blog useful by telling you that Max has a new nickname. Her daddy is worried about her hating it later, but really I don't see the problem with calling her "Moo-Moo." She is now walki- well, running. Causing mayhem. Breaking Christmas trees. And all of the sweet ladies at church know her by name.

Actually, they know she belongs to me. When I enter the nursery they don't hesitate to get her out of there. Not that my little Moo-moo is bad....she just has an attachment to my left arm and likes to throw fits when she's not perched on it.

Moving on.

Jax is three. She's taken to being a good big sister and loves Max most when she is asleep. Kidding. She really does love her.

Jax loves to sing and dance and quote movies. More so when Glee is on. It's quite frightening really, watching a three year old mimicking dance moves to Time Warp and Bad Romance, but I can't help but love it.

K. Well, that's enough written for a test blog. Let's hope this works, and maybe I will share more later.

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Questions to my childhood have been answered. Not that I knew these questions existed but today, in my mind...they were answered.


Back in my day of misspronounced words and tiny clothes I always noticed that my Barbies never had any shoes on. No big deal right? There's really no need. Alot of them were missing parts of their feet. Toes would go missing constantly.

I know what your thinking. Barbie's toes are melted and molded to her body...they don't just fall off. Well they didn't. My mom would bite them off. You see, she has a thing with chewing plastic. Anyway, it occured to me that maybe it wasn't because of her plastic chewing habit that had her relocating Barbie's feet. I now know she HAD to be chewing off their toes because there is absolutely no way to get their feet into their shoes!

Maybe my Barbies weren't missing shoes...maybe life was much more difficult when trying to put them on. Because just moments ago little Jax came to me and said "Mommy look what I found!"

I look at the pink packaging and see a box of Barbie shoes that I had hidden (only because I know Max would seek them out and try to eat them all). I got really excited and said "SHOOOOES!" hoping that my excitment would distract her from getting to her next question.
It didn't work. She thrusted 80's Barbie towards me and said, "Here. Put 'em on."

Well why not, I thought to myself.

After 5 minutes of tugging and pulling and pushing and yanking you want to know what I did? I bit off Barbie's toes. Yes, the shoes now fit. No, I'm not turning into my mother......(Just kidding Momma. You know I'm not being mean).

Logging in some beach hours

Gleeful Jax and Gleeful Max

I am the absolute worst blogger. Ever. I'm great at this Facebook business...but blogging...not so much. Anyway, life has been going full speed around Jax and Max. We are a couple months away from their birthdays and I cannot believe it has been a year since we moved from little town Texas to BIG CITY Texas.

In fact over the weekend I took a trip to one of the biggest cities in California. Upon my return, and flying over my new cities lights, I was astounded by the vast amount of them. But that's neither here nor there. Let's get onto the girls.

Jax is a performer these days. She loves Glee (I'm so proud). Her two favorite songs are My Life would Suck Without You and Gives you Hell (worries me a little...but still proud). She will dance and run all over the place when Glee is on. She knows every turn point that Lea Michelle does on the TV and will raise her voice along side her when singing. It's quite amazing.

Max, who ALSO loves Glee, crawls now at a speed that baffles me. I figured she would be walking by now but she crawls so fast that she just doesn't feel the need to try I guess.

She astounds me every day with her big smiley face. Months ago, when I blogged about her lack of sleep, I think I forgot to mention our trick to get her to stop crying. Of course it's Glee.

Lea Michelle's rendition of Don't Rain on my Parade to be exact. Max can be screaming...exorcist style...and if we replayed the song, through the heavenly technological DVR, she would simply stop crying and just watch. Of course there were many nights where I watched that same song over and over (2 hours was the longest), but it wass worth it.

Have I brain washed my children? I'm not sure...but every Tuesday night at 8...while getting them ready for bed...they sit and watch Glee with the same attention of their 27 year old mother.

....also these beautiful pics of my girls were taken in one of my favorite places at one of my favorite times of the year. I love Texas Bluebonnets!!

Jax to the Max

Jax likes to sing. And by sing I mean carry the same note over and over for long periods of time. She has started to adapt to the ABC song and will sing along with her toys that sing it...but she has a favorite song. "Honeybunch Sugar Pie." She heard it from a download on her Neena's iPhone, and adapted her own version of it. The actual lyrics are:

You're my honey bunch, sugar plum
pumpy yumpy yumkin
you're my sweety pie.

You're my cuppy cake, gum drops
schnookim schnookim schpoor,
the apple of my eye.

And I love you so,
I want you to know
That I'll always be right here.

And I love to sing
these songs to you,
because you are so dear.

That is my interpretation of this song sung by a 3 year old...now this is how Jaxon sings it:



I love hearing her say what she thinks she hears. And her little lisp just adds to it. So for a few more Jaxisms:

Accisent: I'm sorry mommy it was an accisent (accident).

Crappin: Look at me mommy! I'm crappin! (she is clapping)

Skinemwabit: Come on mommy, let's take a bafth (bath)...come on skinemwabit (skin-the-rabbit: which is the removal of one's shirt if you don't speak toddler).

Pack your back: When I'm burping Max she comes up and ask if she can "pack her back" too.

Raincoke: Mommy wook (look) it's raining...I need my raincoke (rain coat).

Nexcutah: Mommy what comes nexcutah (next).

What does a 2 year old hear and see? ......Everything.

When my two year old, Jax, lifted up her shirt last night and pretended to "feed" her baby I started thinking about how fast she has grown up. After laughing my butt off first.

After gaining my composure I sat and thought about the fact that just 6 months ago, most of everything she said was only understood by us parents. Now, you can have an actual conversation with her. Most of the conversation if filled with sayings or expressions that I use:
"Omigosh," "Awe, crap" (<--- I feel really bad about that one), " A few days ago was when I really started to take notice of her awareness...or her ability to remember. I was sitting on the computer...looking at facebook I'm sure...and I hear her talking behind me. She is role playing with two of her Backyardigan toys and it went exactly like this: "Hey Tasha? Do you have to go potty. No I don't have to go potty. Are you sure? I'm sure. Why don't we go sit on the pot just to make sure. Ok, maybe I need to go poopoo. POOPOO! Really! Omigoodness. I know, are you proud of me? Of course I'm proud of you. Am I the princess? The one and only..." She carried on like this for five minutes or so. Just continuing conversation with barely taking a few breaths. She has grown up so fast and every day she has something new to say...or a new idea. She has gotten into her "2 year old" kick and likes to say "NO!" or "nuh-uh." Who teaches that saying anyway? Well, I get onto her...and she begins crying, "I want to say no-o-oooo." When I reply that she cannot talk that way she continues crying, "but. but. can I say va-jj?" Mind you she is wailing at this word. Let me explain this to you. If you don't know the new culturally nickname for the lady part...well that's just what it is. And it's the word that I use, because the original name for it just isn't pretty to me...so yeah I use the nickname...and Jax likes the word too. Of course she doesn't understand it, but sometimes when she yells it out of nowhere people giggle and snort back laughter. Well when I tell her she can't say certain words, like "no," she feels the need to see if she can say va-jj...to see if I will smile at her. Of course I say "No...you shouldn't use words like that either." Then she asks if she can say pomegranate. No. My child is not weird. You have to know how fun it is to see if a two year old can say certain things...and pomegranate was one of those testy words. She learned it around the same time she learned to say the "v" word, and just coincides the two terms together. All of this being said...I can barely do anything now without being copied in some form or fashion...she even talks to Max in the same tone I do, high pitched and squeally. Anyway, I thought I would leave you with a few Jaxisms, if you will, and other funny moments over the past few months.

• She loves to sing and dance to "All the Single Lades." (yes lades.)


• Another favorite song is the Halo mash-up from Glee. But recently she started singing "Somebody to Love." If I replay either of these scenes on my DVR she will sing along to almost all of them, and even quote the lines before and after the song.


• If she toots while she is on the potty she makes this surprised face where her lips make a tight "o." Like she is surprised that happened...I wonder who she got that from...not me of course.


• Senter Calaws=Santa Claus


• Hookem' ....well that's obvious.


• When Petey, our dog, gets out of the kitchen and is roaming around she points, and yells, "Petey! Get back in the kitchen.............neowwww!"


• Anytime she sees the cast of Twilight she lets me know. I'm thinking she may have a small crush on Taylor Lautner because she says his name different then the others. Bella and Edward come out matter of factly...but she says Jacob like she's looking at a million dollars in cash "shaaaacob."

One last conversation between the two of us went like this:

"mommy. I want the pessicope."

o.O (<--- my face)

"Mommy. The pessicope."

O.o .... Jax reaches for the trashcan and pulls out the toilet paper cardboard thingy.

"THE PESSICOPE!" *raises it to her eye* "Arrrrgg Matey"

"Ooooo periscope."

I'll keep up with these Jaxisms...and let y'all know of some more.